For today, I am going to enter my practice trades as usual. But, I am only going to exit them under two circumstances. 1) Stop loss..... 2) Less than 15 minutes to market close. That's it.
I had a lousy day of execution yesterday. I ended with a $159 gain in sim-trading but that is not the point. I had some good entries but exited early because of failure anxiety, leaving much gain on the table. Then, I entered my last trade of the day and instead of hitting my stop when it went against me, I held the losing trade. Unacceptable.
As mentioned previously many times, I have a fear of loss. I don't like the way failure feels. What a strange irony this is, that losing small with stop-outs is the key to success. After all this time, I still have difficulty getting my head around this concept. Intellectually, it is clear to me but emotionally, I can't deal with it. Fear of failure has driven my life since I was a child. It's hard to reprogram over 45 years of life in a few months. But, I will try and then try again. The one thing I hate worse than failure is quitting.
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If it is failure I fear, then it is failure I will embrace. Mike Tyson said that "Everyone has a plan... 'til they get punched in the mouth." Well, this is where I see how much I can take while working my plan. Two ways to exit, stop outs and end of day. My goal is to put losses up on the board, even if there are obvious spots to exit for nice gains. This isn't about winning trades, it is about a search for and embrace of failure in hopes I can be familiar with and comfortable around it.
I will post the results end of day. Accountability might help my resolve.
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Update: 12:55pm. Ok, I had to exit one trade when Mrs. Bluecollar's niece arrived here at the house. She just arrived at noon after driving cross-country. I didn't want to leave the trade on while welcoming her. I'm back at the computer now ready to put up losing trades :-).
